As I've stated previously, I've never finished any project that I've EVER started.
The following is the beginning of a screen play that I abandoned that chronicles the time when I dated a gang banger for 6 months.
It's just the set up and it looks weird as I copied and pasted from my Final Draft software but I think you'll get the gist.
I'm thinking about "blogging" out the rest of the story and then maybe, possibly, I'll be able to finish it. At least in some context.
It probably sucks but here ya go......
DARK SCREEN AS OPENING CREDITS ROLL
We hear Beavis and Butthead initializing another relentless mental assault against the fragile Principal McVicker. His frustrated stutter grows worse and worse until it is finally drowned out by their notorious annoying laughs. Another noise, similar to an exotic jungle bird squawking begins to drown them out.
FADE IN:BEECHWOOD GROUP HOME - 1994
THROUGH FLUTTERING OPENING EYES WE SEE THE SOURCE OF THE NOISE. A LARGE NAKED BLACK MAN IS STANDING OVER US.
THROUGH FLUTTERING OPENING EYES WE SEE THE SOURCE OF THE NOISE. A LARGE NAKED BLACK MAN IS STANDING OVER US.
He is biting his knuckle, slapping his thigh and coming in close to the camera with a “What’d you say bout my mama?” look in his eyes.
This is DARREN.
INT. LIVING ROOM - NIGHT
THE CAMERA PANS OUT and we see his victim lying on the couch in the glow of the t.v. It’s a cute girl in her early twenties wearing a t-shirt, ripped jeans, Doc Martens and piercings in her eyebrows. This is STEPH.
STEPH(scrambling to get up)
Dammit Darren! You scared the crap outta me! What are you doin outta bed?
He doesn’t reply as she grabs him under his muscular arm and leads him down an oversized hallway back to a place where we assume naked, squawking black men are more welcomed. DARREN doesn’t try to get away but does continue to bite his knuckle with a look of pure hatred on his face.
Now enough. It’s time for sleep.
Steph gently pushes Darren into the room and turns to walk away. In a split second Darren re-emerges from the dark room in a rather startling fashion squawking and grabbing at Steph’s hair.
Without an ounce of visible fear, Steph instantly grabs this bare-assed guy whose twice her size, opens the door with her hip and drags him inside.
Steph quickly walks Darren over to his twin size bed and forcefully sits him down on it with a bounce. He still looks pretty pissed but appears to accept that he’s been bested.
Now! LIIIIIE DOWN!
Darren does as he’s told and Steph begins to cover him up.
She tucks him in tight and seems to silently apologize for yelling as she does so. It’s clear that she cares for him but has to be stern.
Alright dude.....good night.
As she turns to leave we see from the light of the hallway that Darren has a room mate. He is also black, in his early thirties and appears to have wedged his penis between his box springs and mattress and is adamantly screwing them. This is STAN.
Ughhhhhh!!!! Ughhhhhhh!!! Ughhhhhh!!!!
STEPH(crossing her arms)
Are you fuckin’ kiddin’ me Stan?
STAN immediately pulls up his pajama pants and jumps back under the covers. He stares at Steph with a devilish smile on his bearded face. She shakes her head as we begin to hear a squeaking noise behind her and she turns to look.
DARREN IS MASTURBATING AND APPEARS TO BE FURIOUS
(gagging)Barf. I mean really guys...I better not hear shit else from either of you tonight.
INT. HALLWAY- CONTINUOUS
As steph re-enters the wheel chair accessible hallway we hear the sweet sounds of Social Distortion began to play in the background.
TITLE CARD - SO WHAT
THE CAMERA FOLLOWS her through the house and we see that other than the large hallway with lit exit sign, we are in what appears to be a pretty normal middle class ranch-style home. Modest halloween decorations hang about and the place is furnished decently. Steph continues on through the kitchen towards the music coming from the family room. Another cute girl in her early twenties, dressed similarly but with short hair and sportin’ an Elmer Fudd hat jumps around wildly in front of the stereo.
This is MINA.
Where the fuck were you? I woke up to choco-balls and dick floppin’ in my face again.
Ummmm, your welcome.
Your a whore.
Dude, Teddy’s here but he’s being a chicken shit and won’t come inside. I was just comin’ to get you.
God he’s such a queer. Does he at least have our hits?
CUT TO:EXT. DRIVEWAY-NIGHT
PARKED IN THE DRIVEWAY ARE 3 DIFFERENT CRAPPY 80’S MODEL DOMESTIC CARS. STEPH, MINA AND TEDDY ARE ARGUING AND SMOKING CIGS IN THE CHILLY FALL MICHIGAN AIR.
TEDDY’s around the same age with a scruffy beard, wearing a flannel and well.... basically the grunge uniform of the time.
TEDDY(agitated towards Steph)
I don’t give a shit if you think it’s stupid. It fucked me up and I’ve been afraid of’em ever since man.
Sooo you saw a retarded guy at Mcdonald’s or something... like a long time ago... and now they freak you out?
(disgusted)Is that what you told her Steph?
(beat) No Mina, your friend is just an asshole. What happened to me was just a little bit more horrible than that.
STEPH(hiding her face)
Please.... fuck no, I can’t hear this again.
THE CAMERA CLOSES IN ON TEDDY’S DREAMING FACE AS HE BEGINS TO HAVE A FLASHBACK.
INT. MCDONALDS - DAY
Teddy appears to be in his teens and is sitting alone at a table chowing down on some killer Mickey D’s. He has braces and tons of acne.
An elderly WOMAN and rather large MAN sit down at the table beside of him. The woman appears to be the man’s mother as she sets up his food for him.
He is quiet and stares down at the floor with a bit of drool running out of his mouth which his mother quickly dabs away. Teddy nervously watches and eats.
O.k. sweetie, mommie’s going to the bathroom. You just eat your cheeseburger like a good boy alright sweetheart?
The man remains silent as his mother exits and the look of concern on Teddy’s face continues to grow.
SUDDENLY the man begins to slap his hamburger and french fries together in his hands and scream the same word over and over.
Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck Fuck!!!!!!!!
Teddy is frozen in fear with a fry hanging from his mouth when the man lurches across the table at him, grabs his Big Mac and slowly caresses Teddy’s face.He strokes Teddy’s hair sensually as he bites into the burger and inch from his face. Teddy can only muster a silent scream as the man then spits it out on the table and begins to laugh hysterically.
Tony, you get yourself over here right now mister.
Sir? (to Teddy)
Are you alright?
TEDDY FROZEN IN FEAR AS URINE RUNS OUT OF HIS PANT LEG.
TEDDY(back from flashback)
So do you get it now?
Can you stop being such a fag?
That depends, can you make my ass stop wanting cock inside of it?
Ughhhhh...noooo....why???Teddy appears to be pleased with his minor victory of grossing Mina out.
O.k. then why the fuck did you agree to come up here and drop with us tonight? (beat)
Did you think we were going to just hang out in the front yard all night?
Hands in pockets Teddy looks down kicking rocks.
I didn’t have shit else to do.
Well that hasn’t changed soooo....look they are all in bed. You won’t even see’em... we swear.
CUT TO:INT. FAMILY ROOM-NIGHT
Corrosion of Conformity plays in the background as Teddy, Mina and Steph sit around a coffee table passing a joint and intensely playing Candyland. The clock behind Steph reads 2:00 a.m.
Oh my God dude, I am in the fuckin’ Candy Land right now and I AM trippin’ my tits off.
MINA(huge smile nodding)
Teddy this is some clean shit. Please tell me you got a whole sheet?
TEDDY(ignoring the question)
So Steph how’s it going living with Amee? Been raped by any random black guys yet?
Mina slaps him on the arm and gestures for him to shut-up.
So she likes the night stick? Big deal.
She leaves me alone and fucking anything beats moving back in with my parents.
Have you heard from Allen?
No....I think he’s finally accepted it.
(beat)How bout we not talk about personal drama while were supposed to be escaping from reality? K?
Wait....what are you talkin’ about?
Teddy takes off his flannel and reveals his t-shirt for the first time. It’s a silk screen print of the posthumous Kurt Cobain Rolling Stone cover.
STEPH(pointing to Teddy’s shirt)
That’s what! Why the hell do you want us thinking about Kurt Cobain blowing his fucking head off tonight Teddy?
Yeah man, I cried for like 3 or 4 minutes when that issue came in the mail.
Are you serious? You guys are the retards. These mother fuckers(pointing around) need to be wiping your asses.
Steph is in a zombie like trance as she stares at the shirt.
I think he just talked to me. (closing her eyes)He said Courtney did it.
You shut your mouth! She LOVED him!
O.kkkkkkk., just turn it inside out or something for god’s sake.
Teddy reluctantly stands and starts to comply.
Noooooo sir. You go in the bathroom. I couldn’t possibly handle seeing your gay, man-child torso right now.
Teddy looks nervously towards the hall.
Dude it’s not like their not gonna drink your blood or something.
Mina begins to laugh hysterically slapping the table.
TEDDY (O.S.)(walking out)
Teddy is barely gone from view when Steph and Mina begin conspiring.
O.k. I’ll get the stuff set up....you go get Jerry.
You realize this may be the laugh that kills us.
That’s a risk I’m willing to take.
CUT TO: TEDDY FLUSHING THE TOILET.
He strides to the sink quickly and begins ferociously washing his hands as he is clearly trying to get the hell out of there a.s.a.p. He glances up at the mirror and his face transforms to reveal absolute revulsion.
A GIANT GREEN BOOGER WIPED ACROSS THE MIRROR.
Oh...I’m gonna ralph...
As he reaches for a paper towel we begin to hear the opening chords of “Blind” by Korn eminating from the hallway. As the music grows louder and louder (O.S.) teddy drys his hands at warp speed and begins to run for the door.
TEDDY(under his breath)
Those stupid bitches.
CUT TO:TEDDY’S POINT OF VIEW- SLOW MOTION
The door opening is in sequence to Johnathan Davis finally unleashing his vocals with “ARRRE YOUUUU READDDDY??!!!!”
Hopping towards Teddy like a giant, psychotic bunny rabbit(also in sequence to the vocals) is house resident JERRY.
Jerry is 6”4 and about 360 pounds. He is wearing a clown wig and Pajamas and his facial features change menacingly in the strobe light that has been positioned behind him in the dark hall way.
SERIES OF ALTERNATING QUICK SHOTS BETWEEN TEDDY’S FACE SHRIEKING AND JERRY’S CHILD LIKE FACE MORPHING INTO A FULL FLEDGED DEMON.
CUT TO:TEDDY RUNNNING DOWN THE HALL TOWARDS THE EXIT SIGN SCREAMING.
Teddy scrambles past naked Darren and Stan who have also made their way into the hallway and kicks the back door to freedom with all his might.
The door opens to reveal Steph standing there wearing an O.J. Simpson mask and brandishing a bloody knife. Teddy locks up in fear and looks like a petrified tree.
He slumps slowly to the floor. Steph removes the mask and starts laughing but stops abruptly when she realizes that Teddy is possibly catatonic.
Shut the music off! Turn the lights on!
Steph pats Teddy on his face lightly as the music dies and the lights come up and reveals another resident who has been awakened. She’s petite, in her thirties and has her index finger pointed at her own face as though she’s telling herself off. This is ANGIE.
I hit people right! That’s right bitch!
Mina along with the rest of the residents now gather round Steph, Teddy and Angie.
ANGIE(still pointing to her face)
I said I hit people right! Bitch!
Noooo Angie... you didn’t do anything. This is our fault.
Dude if he dies.... this is going to be a really bad trip.
Dude if he dies.... this is going to be a really bad trip.
Was wrong wit him? Is he sad?
Steph cradles Teddy in her arms and continues slapping his face as he continues to stare blankly at the ceiling.
Mina attempts to corral Darren away from the situation at hand.
Snap out of it FAGGOT!!!
Teddy’s eyes flutter slowly as he cuts his gaze towards Steph.
Please get them away from me before my heart explodes you fucking cunt.
Steph looks over joyed as she triumphantly grasps Teddy’s cheeks in her hands and squeezes them like a Grandma.
Who wants ice cream?
CUT TO:INT. STEPH’S CAR - DAY (MOVING)
Steph bangs her head tremendously and passionately sings along to loud rock music as she pulls into a parking space. she looks pretty haggard and yawns while she is thrashing. As she steps out of the car we see that she is in a development of nicely kempt, modest town homes. She sings to herself as she turns the key in the lock and pushes the door open.
What the fuck?
As she enters the living room there is a very fat naked white woman having sex with a a very skinny BLACK MAN on the floor. The woman is Steph’s roommate AMEE.
Duuuuuude!!!! Get out!! Come back later.
The man rolls over and looks back to view whose addressing them and appears to like what he sees.
Now c’mon girl, let’s talk about this. Ain’t no need for your pretty lil friend to be rushing off nah. Let’s take some time to get to knoooow each other.
He wipes his hand on Amee’s ass and then reaches it out to aid his introduction to Steph.
Hi, I’m Perry
Steph declines his gesture and shoots daggers at Amee who looks more than a little bit humiliated. Steph says nothing as she backs out closing the door.
CUT TO:INT. SMALL CRAPPY KITCHEN - DAY
Steph takes a peek in the fridge only to find nothing but a bowl of some kind of batter with a spoon sticking out of it.
She takes a seat at the distressed table and lights up a Kool out of a pack she finds laying on the table.
MAN’S VOICE (O.S.)
What the hell are you doin in there? Smokin’ my cigarettes?
Steph puts it out hastily in a giant 70’s style ashtray that is filled to the brim with butts. Right on cue the questioner enters the room. It’s a burly bearded man in his early 40’s. He’s wearing “once” whitey tighties, rubbin’ his belly and belching as he enters the room. This is HARRY Steph’s step-dad.
I knew you was smokin’em. You little shit, what are you doin’ here? I thought you moved out with your nigger lovin’ girl friend.
Harry walks to the fridge, opens it and stares at the batter bowl. When his back turns to us we see a large brown streak on his underwear and he lets a wet fart. Steph looks physically disgusted.
Yeah well... I just worked a double and I didn’t know that they were spraying for bugs at our place this morning and I just needed to crash here for a few hours.
Harry shuffles over and plops down at the table lighting a Kool just for him.
Whatever. Will you go get me some White Castles?
I just told you that I’m tired as shit and I really need to lay down...
He pitches her a cigarette.
I’ll set you up with some if you go
.CUT TO:EXT. DRIVEWAY- DAY
Steph is getting out of the car carrying sacks of White Castle's when we hear screaming coming from the small lower middle class home she’s about to enter.
Well if you ever were a real woman and had sex with your husband sometimes maybe there would be groceries in this house!
Steph looks even more haggard as she looks around quickly and notices one neighbor next door raking leaves and listening intently.
WOMAN’S VOICE (O.S.)
Well maybe if you ever washed your ass or spoke to me like a human being I would.
Steph enters the small poorly decorated living room to find Harry screaming at a petite blond woman in her pajamas also in her early 40’s smokin a cigarette with deep black circles under her eyes. This is Steph’s mom SHARON.
I mean Goddamn Sharon, when are you gonna stop being crazy? This shit’s been going on for a fucking decade already.
Sharon snatches a bag of White Castles from Steph’s hand and starts beating Harry all over his body with it.
You evil bastard! Your the reason I’m crazy! You did this to me!!!
Mommmmm....not the food for christ sakes.
Harry and Sharon continue to scream and argue as Steph grabs a couple of burgers out of the sack and leaves the rest on the floor model television. She silently leaves the room and heads for the basement door.
INT. BASEMENT (CONTINUOUS)
Steph falls out on a nasty looking old couch and clicks on the t.v. She flips and flips searching for anything as she chows down on her White Castle’s. She stops on the 700 Club and listens to all the predicitions of the end of time and what not.As both of the cronies spew their nonsense, the camera closes in on Steph’s face. After a couple of seconds the face changes to that of a little girl (young Steph).
INT. SMALL 70’S STYLE CHURCH
We hear preaching coming from O.S. as the camera pans to reveal that the small church is filled with parishioners.
And I know some of you in here tonight are saying to yourselves, he’s not talking to me. I’m a good person, I’m not going to hell.
Well children I’m here to tell that if you haven’t been washed in the blood of the lamb, that’s exactly where your going. God only takes those who have been saved and we are living in the last days....that’s right.
The preacher dabs the white bits of spit that have gathered in the corners of his mouth with a handkerchief and breathes heavily into the microphone.
Can I get our singers to come up?
A small group of women of all different sizes and ages make their way to the tiny stage behind the pulpit carrying hymnals. One sits down at an ancient plain piano and begins lightly playing.
Jesus is giving you another chance tonight and if you want what he has to offer..come on up here.
GROUP OF SINGERS
Soft-ly and ten-der-ly Jesus is calling. Calling for you and for me....
Young Steph stares blankly at the persuasive spectacle before her.
We all know were coming to the end. He’s coming back soon and you can either have your name in the Book of Life,be saved and go home to paradise or....or... children you can stay here...stay here and take the mark of the beast.
Stay here and have your skin ripped from it’s bones by flying snakes with gnashing, razor like teeth...
Steph sits straight up awake and appears to be extremely startled.
CUT TO:INT.-STEPH’S CAR-MOVING-NIGHT
Steph and Mina are smoking cigarettes and bobbing their heads in unison to the music pumping out of the crappy factory stereo. As they drive we can begin to see that they are in a very dilapidated neighborhood. Stereotypical, dirty Detroit. Steph cuts the music down suddenly.
O.k. man, where the hell is this place? Were like so deep into crack town right now it’s insane.
Mina begins to rummage through her purse.
Wait you got off at Livernois right?
Yes, just like you said and I haven’t seen any place that would resemble a club we’d go to.
Mina’s digging finally pays off as she finally finds the flyer she’s looking for.
O.k., o.k. It says right here Livernois exit. We must’ve passed it. Just make a U-ey and go back.
Oh for fuck’s sake.
Steph makes the U-turn and they come to a stop at a red light. They seem to be the only car on the road until ominous bass booming (O.S.) begins to draw closer. Both girls look as though they are bracing for the worst. Beside of them in an old beat up muscle car pulls up two good looking guys also in their early twenties. The passenger appears to be white but the driver is obviously Hispanic. They both look over at the same time and smile slyly.
STEPH(whispering for no reason)
Duuuuude...they are like some hot ass criminals or sumthin...and they want me to roll the window down.
The passenger rolls his window down with a confidant look that says he is fully intent on making some conversation during their tenure at the red light.
Steph, I know your fucking mentally disabled but c’mon. We - are- in- the- fuck-ing- ghet-toooooo. Are you serious?
Steph rolls down the window anyway.
Soooo, on our way to a Pearl Jam concert are we?
Both guys look at each other and simultaneously break up into laughter.
You like this? They’re like so totally breaking our balls.
Wow, I’ve never been taunted by gang bangers before. What should we do?
Steph shifts in her seat uncomfortably deciding what to do.
STEPH(yelling to guys)
Yeah but I’m sure a couple of stereotypical gangster types like yourself would have no idea where anything like that would be?
Both mens smiles fade.
Shut up asshole!
Bet if we were looking for a Scarface concert you’d know all bout it bout it.
After about 5 seconds of uncomfortable silence both men erupt into volcanic bellows of laughter.
Alright girl, alright. Seriously you guys are lost though right?
Were trying to get to a club called Mass Hysteria.
OH, no shit? I know exactly where that is. You can follow us if you want.
CUT TO:STEPH AND MINA FOLLOWING TAIL LIGHTS.
The car has left the main road and they are now traveling through a residential neighborhood that looks like it has been partially napalmed. Tall Detroit row houses hold each other up against the narrow car filled streets.
Ultimate bad idea, fucking horrible. Where the hell are they taking us?
Steph’s eyes dart around cautiously as she trys to keep her composure together.
Dude, will you chill already? We are in a moving vehicle that can be used as a “get away car” if necessary. Ever heard of one of those?
No sooner do the words leave Steph’s lips do we see that the street has dead ended at a house and Hector and Chris quickly park their car and swiftly jump out.
Fuck man, fuck!! Were gettin raped. Like probably with Colt 45 bottles and shit.
Lock your door..I’m turnin’ around.
My fuckin’ door’s been locked since we got off the freeway. Yours hasn’t!!!???
Steph puts the car in reverse as both guys step out in front of her in such a way that she would have to hit them in order to go forward.
Chris walks over to Steph’s window and raps lightly on the glass smiling the whole time.